Potty Training: The First Disaster

Last Monday we decided it was about time we got on board the potty training train (?!), and started the arduous process of removing nappy changes from our lives. We went for the fairly drastic tactic of simply ditching nappies altogether and popping George into undies, whilst explaining he MUST tell an adult if he needed the toilet.

How foolish we were.

On the first day I think we managed about two half wees on target while the rest took place all over our living room carpet. Great.

However, I refused to give in and rendered myself housebound in an attempt to make a potty training breakthrough. Finally, on Friday we managed to get all the way to town, have a relatively stress-free lunch, and return home – all accident free! (And I barely even had to bribe him to use the loo!)

So today, being the chancer that I am, I decided we’d try our first playgroup sans nappy. My changing bag was well stocked with wipes, spare undies/bottoms/socks, and even a wealth of pull ups, just in case our supply at home was stolen while we were out.

We managed a car trip, a visit to the doctors, the walk to the library and even the first half of playgroup before disaster struck.

George tucked himself away in a corner and I immediately knew this was a bad sign. Grabbing his hand I frantically asked, ‘do you need the toilet, what’s happening?!’ To which he equally frantically replied, ‘need a wee Mummy, let’s go to the toilet quick!’ Okay, I thought, crisis averted, he’s not wet = no accidents.

How wrong I was. 

Upon arrival at the 2×2 metre squared windowless sauna of a child’s toilet we swiftly climbed the step to the urinal, pulled his pants down, and alas, nada. No wees. Just a shout of ‘I DON’T NEED TO MUMMY, CLEAN ME UP!’ Oh god. That should’ve been my first clue. But no. I was too busy sweating and suffocating in the windowless room.

All of a sudden it hit me, that smell, the all too familiar smell when you know there’s been a Code Brown situation. I checked his pants, yep, definitely something there but not much, maybe we can rectify this. I stood him away from the loo ready to get him cleaned up and felt my blood turn cold as he pointed towards the toilet step and said, ‘there’s the poo Mummy’.

I won’t go into too much gory detail (no more than I already have – soz). But the resulting scene looked something like this; Poo on George, poo on George’s undies and trousers, a huge poo on the floor, poo footsteps as we’d also BOTH STEPPED IN IT, a serenely calm toddler and a sweaty almost laughing with panic/bordering on insane Mother.

Just a couple of notes for all you potty training Mamas out there. Don’t leave your changing bag 20 metres away across a library through 2 doors. Toilet roll is not, and never will be, as effective as baby wipes. Baby wipes are God. And finally, if you ever end up washing poo off both your own, and your toddlers, shoes in a public library bathroom, please remember you are not alone.

 

#chucklemums

 

The Pramshed
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20 thoughts on “Potty Training: The First Disaster

  1. Oh god poor you! I am terrified of “properly” starting potty training haha, I’m wondering if I leave it long enough one day she’ll just put pants on and BOOM, potty trained. Wishful thinking maybe 😉 x

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  2. oh my goodness!!!! ok, here’s the possible silver lining: he is very likely to do that poo on the potty next time. my daughter avoided the potty for number twos until she trod in her excrement barefoot one day. Lesson learned and it was plain sailing after that. well done for surviving and thanks for sharing that hilarious story! I could just imagine it! good luck! #chucklemums

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  3. Haha I am right there with you in this hell right now. Today my daughter refused to poo anywhere but the bath so I had to put a potty in the bath and sing her a made up song about mr poo wanting to go and see his friends down the toiled. For actual shame.
    Thanks for sharing with #chucklemums!

    Liked by 2 people

  4. I don’t mean to laugh at your misfortune…. But it’s a pretty funny story. No, wait, it’s hilarious! Sorry. ☺️ and oh so very familiar. Except we’ve (thankfully) not had PUBLIC number-two disasters, only wet ones, I still feel your pain though. Xx

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Ah this really made me laugh, sorry! We’re just about to take the dreaded plunge into potty training outside the house so this has got me prepared, the bag will be surgically attached to my side!! Great story bless you xx

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Oh god Rosie…! It’s hilarious, but of course I feel deeply sorry for you all at once… I was dealing with it until I read that you both stepped in it, then I just thought ‘no, that’s too big a mess, I don’t even know where I’d start on this one!’ Hopefully now he’ll understand that it makes a huge mess, lots of fuss, and won’t do it again! We have been trying to potty train the eldest for a YEAR AND A HALF now… I went for a similar approach to you-took the nappy off and just wasn’t going to put it on again. But he screams about having pants put on like he’s being murdered. And usually until he vomits. So we’ve tried, been advised to stop because ‘he’s obviously not ready,’ tried, stopped because…yea, on a loop like that for a year and a half. The irony is, he says, mummy, I’m just going to wee/poo, then I’ll need changing,’ but try and fight him onto the toilet to do it and the shaking, terror and vomiting starts-it’s pretty horrendous. We managed pants and 2 wees on the toilet today-the most success we’ve ever had… May the force be with both of us!!
    #bigpinklink

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    1. God I think stepping in it was the most traumatising part haha! Got to laugh at it now though 😂😂 Vomiting rather than using the potty is a nightmare for you! G just starts going ‘noooo don’t want the potty’ and then wees on the floor seconds later – the worst. It’s such hard work isn’t it, if I read one more account of someone potty training their 18 month old in 3 days I’m going to scream 😩 We’ll get there in the end though, I know we will! Xxx

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  7. Just wait till you get to the point where you turn round to get the wet wipes (which are God!) to turn back and find the little darling smearing…yes smearing with their actual had…it all over and I mean ALL over! X

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Oh god this sounds like one of those moments that you just want to crawl into a dark hole and not come out for a while! I can only imagine how you must have felt, and I hope you can look back on it and laugh. But well done George for being so good with potty training before the incident, I hope that it’s got better since you’ve published this post. And, you’re right, nothing can substitute a baby wipe. Thanks so much for linking up at #fortheloveofBLOG. Claire x

    Liked by 1 person

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